Jailhouse Rock

The warden threw a party in the county jail.
The prison band was there and they began to wail.
The joint was jumpin' and the band began to swing.
You should've heard those knocked out jailbirds sing.
Let's rock, everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock.

Spider Murphy played the tenor saxophone,
Little Joe was blowin' on the slide trombone.
The drummer boy from Illinois went crash, boom, bang,
the whole rhythm section was the Purple Gang.
Let's rock, everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock.

Number forty-seven said to number three:
"You're the cutest jailbird I ever did see.
I sure would be delighted with your company,
come on and do the Jailhouse Rock with me."
Let's rock, everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock.

The sad sack was a sittin' on a block of stone
way over in the corner weepin' all alone.
The warden said, "Hey, buddy, don't you be no square.
If you can't find a partner use a wooden chair."
Let's rock, everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock.

Shifty Henry said to Bugs, "For Heaven's sake,
no one's lookin', now's our chance to make a break."
Bugsy turned to Shifty and he said, "Nix nix,
I wanna stick around a while and get my kicks."
Let's rock, everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock.

Po II wojnie swiatowej Stalin oglosil rozpoczecie budowy komunizmu w ZSRR. W jednym z kolchozow Uzbekistanu zwolano zebranie partyjne poswiecone komunizmowi, jednak nikt nie wiedzial, co znaczy slowo komunizm. Wybrano wiec delegata, ktory po dlugiej podrozy dotarl przed oblicze Stalina i pyta, co znaczy to slowo. Stalin chwile mysli, w koncu przywoluje delegata do okna.
- Widzicie towarzyszu te ciezarowke?
- Widze.
- Jak bedzie komunizm, to beda tu staly tysiace takich ciezarowek!
Delegat wraca do kolchozu. Wszyscy pytaja go, co to jest ten komunizm. Delegat podchodzi do okna i mowi:
- Widzicie tego zbraka?
- Widzimy.
- Jak bedzie komunizm, to tu beda tysiace takich zbrakow!

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