Maniaq

ANDREO
Smith-hyphen-Moore-hyphen-Brown-hyphen-Gore,
Some more hyphens with Johnson and Green;
Palmer and Hook, and then Matterson, Cooke,
And Pierce, and then Winters and Dean;
Some more of my family is Drinkwater, Wheatland, then Waters, Fields,
Hopkins and Banks;
There's Studham and Stidham, then add a whole cache
Of more hyphens for Benson and Hawkins and Nash,
Wells-Wheeler and Richmond, then add one more dash --
Make some more room for "Turne" now. Thanks!
Martinez-Melendez-Rodriguez-Menendez,
Garcia, and Ruiz and Ruz;
Calderon and Paz, Barraza-Diaz,
Saenz and Alvarez, Cruz;
Gomez and Suarez and Lopez and Juarez, Zamora, Andrade, Ortegas;
Villanueva, Ojeda and Prado and Sias,
Trujillo-Velazquez-Machado-Casillas,
Riviera-Jimenez-Ortiz-Perez-Dias
Hinojosa-Bermudez and Vegas!
Rivoire-Cartier-Breaux-Lamoureux-Vallée,
Bailly, LeClair and Perot;
And let's not forget Lafayette and Vallette
And Peugeot, Baudelaire, Beliveau!
Laroche-Vaux-Giroux-Beauchamp-LaCasse-Ledoux, and Dupont and Dupris
and DuBose
And after I've recited Bruchon and D'Alain,
And then Brun and LeJean and Caron and Jourdain,
Beaudoin and Mallein and Cézanne, Guillotin,
I can balance this pen on my nose!
Russo-Petrini-Vespucci-Rossini,
Dell'aqua-Farina-Falcone
Moretta and Izzo and, yes, even Zizzo,
Vinci-Gentile-Calderone
Poletta-Guidotti-Puccini-Barsotti, my list is still far from
complete
'Cause there's still Lo Bianco, Lombardo, Rossetti,
Quilici, Costanza, Buono, Allegretti
Of course Malucelli and then Cappelletti
Now, how would you like some to eat?
Cohen-Strauss-Kahn-Kaplan-Levin-Dayan,
Rothschild, Shapiro and Steinberg;
Eppinger-Klein-Goldfarb-Mokoltov-Stein,
Blumenthal, Isaacs and Feinberg;
Rosenberg, Rosenthal, Goldman, and Stahl, Roth and Rothau-Steinau-
Rosenau
There's Silver and Diamant, speaking of which,
Then add Goldberg and Silverstein --
CHENG
Boy, is he rich!
ANDREO
Hirschfeld-Levine-Howitt-Rabinowitz,
Hohenstein, Feldman, Landau<
MacArthur-Boswell-Sanders-Bothwell
Sanderson-Stuart-Shaw;
Ross-Grant-Scott;
PITTMAN
Names as long as this ought
To be against the law!
ANDREO
McDonald-Johnstone-McIntyre-Keown-Maguire-Lang-Hepburn-Sinclair
Epperson-Edison-Murray-Farquhar,
Morrison-Boyle-Abernathy-Dunbar,
Forsythe-McLeod-Cunningham-Crichton-Urquhar;
Gordon, Andrews, and what else is there?
Ezra-Bazzar, and Ali and Zavvar
Rafsanjani, Tufayl, Ibrahim;
And I'm proud to concede that there's also Said,
Karampour-Hussein and Rahim.
I can trace a whole streak of some names like Meliq and Saleh on my
family tree;
Besides that: Rezaie-Abdul, and there's Khomeini,
Soleimani-Karami; and Hamzeh-Momeni,
Hayyam-Quzman-Muhammad-Abdallah-Joveyni;
Akidjan-Surayj-Taymuree!
By some choice of karma, the surname of Sharma
Was assigned to a small select few;
And Vasu-Devan, Sankar, Sanakran and Shankar,
And Yadav, Raman and Babu!
Chandrasekharan-Sen-Gandhi-Prabaker, then there are Chandra and Singh
and Iyer;
Ramaswami, and then Ramakrishna and Bhatt;
Patel, Srinivasan, I also have got
The names Bhattacharyya, Sandhu, Venkat,
Sankarasubramanian in there.
Arita-Yamada-Tanaka-Imada;
Tashiro-Hitomi-Sasaki,
Toyota-Fukuchi, and then Yamaguchi;
Suzuki and then Kawasaki!
The next names -- Nakanishi, and Ito and Kishi,
Also hail from the land of Japan,
But I still have to list Honda and Minamoto;
Watanabe, Uyeno, of course Miyamoto,
Yamamoto-Akaishi and then Yoshimoto!
Shimamura . . . but do call us "san"!
Seppa-Kallinen-Mattinen-Hanninen,
Myyra, Ritola, Nevala;
Musta-Alalahti-Keskilahti,
Raty-Koski-Ojala;
There are Nurmi, Partanen, and Kangas, Mustanen; Saari-Aaltonen-
Waltonen;<
When they hear the name "Larva" then everyone grins,
But that grub's just the place where the fun all begins,
'Cause we've still got Hasu, not to mention the Finns
Named Suvio, Iso or Nisonen!
With the S and the Z, we go to Hungary,
With Szabo and Szilard and Szasz,
Szekely and Csak, and I won't even talk
About Eg - er - sze - gi, oh my gosh!
Torok and Miszei, Nagy, too, and Gyenge, Berkes and Harangi and Kun,
Kocsis, Karoly, Wladar; and, yes,
With the help of the consonant diphthong C-S,
Csupo and Csider, and then Enekes;
I ought to be done with this soon.
There's this small part with Vang, and a few who're named Yang
Then Xiong; most just go by those three;
But it wouldn't be fair to leave out Her,
As that's also in my family.
There's Thor and Vue, and then next write Kue,
And Shur, Xong, and Lo, and Saykao;
Then there are Lor and Hang, and then Ly and Cha;
My great-great-great-grandmother gives us, as well, Pha;
Moua and Thao, one more hyphen, then Na;
It's a long name, but don't have a cow!
There are Sangco and Songco,
Atengco, Tiongco;
Toliongco and Tangco; Siangco;
Tiogongco, Unpingco,
Chahuangco, Tydingco,
Luchangco, Cohuangco, Tiangco!
And Tengco,
Tayengco;
Alesana-Lutu-Paopao;
There's Ravuvu, and Vailahi,
Leialoha, and Keahi;
Mandela-Matsepe-Ngema-Boganda;
Bambara-Tutu-Opango, and Banda.
There's a slight chance there may be a few that I missed,
But I'm pretty sure that I am done with my list,
And you look like you're getting a cramp in your wrist!
So let's end it up with Teritaau.
Teritaau,
Yes, let's end it up with Teritaau!

Byl rok 1943. Spory konwoj przemierzal wody polnocnego Atlantyku w drodze do Murmanska. Byla jasna, ksiezycowa noc. Na mostku polskiego statku, kapitan wzywa bosmana i rzecze:
- Widzicie, bosmanie, ten lad trzy mile na prawej burcie? Wlasnie U-boot strzelil torpede. Idziemy w ciasnym szyku bez mozliwosci manewru. Wedlug moich obliczen, torpeda ta trafi nas za piec minut. Zejdzcie do zalogi i przygotujcie marynarzy do opuszczenia statku. Nie ma dla nas ratunku.
Bosman, nie dyskutujac, czym predzej ruszyl w glab parowca by wykonac rozkaz. Ale z byl osobnikiem nie pozbawionym humoru, a przy tym chlop jak niedzwiedz, postanowil obrocic cala sprawe w zart. Wszedl do pomieszczen zalogi, zebral marynarzy i rzecze:
- Widzicie, chlopcy, ten stolek tutaj? Jak zaraz pier*.*ne w niego czlonkiem, to caly statek w drebiezgi pojdzie.
Marynarze, acz doskonale wiedzieli o mitycznej wrecz sile bosmana, tym razem wybuchneli smiechem, kiwajac glowami z niedowierzaniem. Rozezlil sie bosman okrutnie i jak nie wrzasnie:
- To sie zalozcie, gnojki jedne, jak zscie tacy pewni, a w miedzyczasie zakladac kamizelki ratunkowe.
Rozweseleni marynarze zaczeli zbierac pule zakladu, zakladajac przy okazji kapoki. Bosman odczekal chwile, spojrzal na zegarek, nonszalanckim ruchem wyciagnal narzedzie, spojrzal pogardliwie wokolo i BUM!
Statek poszedl w drzazgi! Porod rozbitkow, ktorzy uszli z zyciem, byli bosman i kapitan. W pewnym momencie podplywa do bosmana kapitan, caly szary z przeraznia.
- Na Boga, bosmanie, co sie stalo? Torpeda minela statek za rufa!!!

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